My focus is how I’m changing internally while the world around me changes, and how that changing self moves through an ever-evolving world in linear time. As I progress along the continuum of growth, my sense of self and how I look at the world is gradually and irrevocably altered, and yet life’s constant repetition imprints a template of sameness on each moment. The feelings of stability and familiarity imposed by this repetition are undermined by the strangeness and remoteness of how different our past selves are from who we are now and who we will become. Gradients of color and shadow act like a filmstrip indicating forward momentum, and the progression of time is seen. Focus is not only given to how the world through my eyes changes through time, but also what is empirically happening to the world around me. The doom of our future feels nearer every day and yet the days repeat with a mundane uniformity. Our responsibility as we progress through time is symbolized in footsteps, each step a choice along the path we choose. We can purposefully keep altering ourselves so that we can see the change in addition to the comforting repetition. We can look at the fixed path of our past and the series of small choices that created it and thereby understand our place in time.
I’m trying to capture what it feels like to have lost the stability of being grounded in the present moment because the flow of change is overpowering the familiar sense of repetition in the daily routine.